Trying to catch my breath

Exactly eight whole seconds has passed since the first taste of silence began in this house today. I am sitting here with a cup of home made hot chocolate, sounds nice doesn't it? Seems so rare that I get a chance to enjoy anything these days. I can just barely hold my head up over this pile of despairing events that are toppling over each other in my lap. Oh, they are piling higher, and higher, and higher.  But if I can just peak over the top, maybe, just maybe I can get a glimpse of the Father... just a glimpse of a piece of truth... all things work together for good. All things work together for good of those who love the Lord. If I can just believe that no matter how bad, no matter how many tears are shed, no matter how hopeless I feel, no matter how I ache, if I could just hold on a little longer maybe that will get me through one more day. But how? How do I feel peaceful in the here and now in all the sorrows of the day? How can I appreciate one little blessing when it seems swallowed up by a thousand curses? Sometimes doing everything you can just isn't enough. I am not enough.  So, I just wait on Him not because I am that good, not because I am that holy, but because He leaves me no other choice. He is God. It is just up to me to believe that He does have control.